“The only difference between you and me. When I look at myself, all I can see… is that I’m just another lady without- a Ba-by.” – Jenny Lewis
“Just one of the guys” is the first single released from the album THE VOYAGER by Jenny Lewis. I’ve always been a fan of her and felt a sort of kinship with her. We both grew up as child actresses and have now gone on to the something different. Jenny went on to write and perform music, and I’ve gone from being in front of to behind the camera.
In fact, I used to see her at auditions all the time when we were kids and she was always so lovely to me. Granted, we were both 10 but you’d be surprised at how nasty some little girls can be. I was so stoked the first time I saw Jenny perform with her band Rilo Kiley. She looked so comfy up there with her guitar, the only girl in a all guy rock band. I thought… I feel you girl. I’m so happy for you that you broke out of the industry and are doing your thang and doing it soooooo well. I never got a chance to tell her that, but I support her by buying all her albums and signing my heart out to her songs when no one is listening of course.
And once again, I have to say… I feel you girl. I am also kinda plagued by the “one of the guys” syndrome. Add to that this damn biological clock and everyone around me popping out babies. It’s enough to make a woman crazy! I was in my garage the other day, looking at all my surfboards, skateboards and snowboards and thought– whoa. What happened here? Have I actually succeeded in becoming one of the guys?
I believe it all started back in the day when I would come home from work and there would be anywhere between 5-15 dudes skateboarding in my front yard. My mom spent a lot of time with me at work and my brothers took advantage of the situation by inviting all their friends over to skate and eat cereal. At the time, I was working a ton on General Hospital which teenage boys did NOT think was cool. Soap operas were what their grandmas watched. I remember getting asked more than once a week if I could cry on cue and how may times I thought about my dog dying. I didn’t have a dog at the time…
I wanted to be cool. I wanted to be like them. I wanted to skate.
So I bought myself a pair of Van’s half- Cabs and learned to ollie. I still got made fun of but they couldn’t call me a princess with high tops and a skateboard in my hand. Try it- I dare you. And that’s sort of how it went. Now, here I am with a garage full of toys and no baby.
Of course there are many other reasons and circumstances why I don’t have children (not wanting them isn’t one of them) but what I find interesting in Jenny’s song is the direct correlation to being “one of the guys’ and being childless. The good news is, I’m not scared of paddling into a wave or boarding down a mountain. My brothers taught me so much about being tough, taking risks and hell- a lot about the culture of skateboarding. It was a welcome contrast to hot rollers, photo shoots and kissing soap hunks. It’s probably what kept me grounded in retrospect.
And as far as the baby thing goes… I’ve had the privilege of watching some of my dearest friends children grow up. I’m close to so many of them and they bring so much joy to my life. I’m an Auntie, a Nina and a God mom. And I hope to have my own little stinker some day.
Here is a pic of a little girl I met when she was born and the next one is a pic of her yesterday. She just turned 7 and she is so beautiful.
And far as Jenny Lewis goes… I hope to see her in her My Little Pony suit and guitar one day soon. Keep on Keepin on.